take a picture (of my life)

mourning a loss

2011-10-16T05:58:00.002+08:00

why is it that we often try to find more meaning than there really is with the passing of someone?

when jay posted the picture of s78 on fb, i was feeling all warm and fuzzy inside

sure i wasnt that close to yew chong or really knew her for who she was,

but she was once part of my life

and when she passed on, it just felt like i lost that tiny part of my life,

the one when i'm standing at the bench with shus and yew chong says something funny

the one when miss claire said she wasnt gonna be with us for the next year

the one when the class visited her in the hospital

the one when we celebrated with a cake when she came back to us

and the one when i met her in uni and was relieved she made it here with us, she was a year late, but nothing matters, she's here with us now.

and when jay posted the photo, i was glad, she brought the class closer together than we ever were since we left school.

she brought our hearts together and brought us back to the time when we were celebrating her return at the class bench.

and then i wonder, do we put more meaning to it than there really is.

she moved on without us, is there really more to it?

what if she really doesnt know what happens here anymore,

what if she doesnt see us get closer, what if she doesnt have access to fb wherever she is?

how do i tell her then?

that i'm thankful to you yew chong for being that tiny part of my life

rest in peace dear, we'll miss you.

i hope he took her from us for a good reason, and led her to a better place.

2010-08-08T02:40:00.000+08:00

301st post D:
i'm moving over to:
regalpea.livejournal.com

2010-07-27T03:46:00.002+08:00

wooohooo my 300th post on blogger. hahaha.
okay, i dont know what im elated abt.
updates: work ended :D and im back from the motherland of cheapo shopping (so cheap that it scares my mom!) BKKKKKKKKKKK!

yayes, and now that im so free,
got a whole bunch of things to catch up to again!
1) SHOWSSSSS! :thankyewww dear dear for dlding shows to entertain me while he's off to hall camp :/ cant crash :'( megasaddasauraus
2) OWEEK CAMP :next week. L4D2 every night!!!!!
3) ROOM DECO :procrastinated since 89435734 years ago, i shall down put my ass, head and hands down to DIYYYYing my room :D :D prweets prweets. hearts and cages and photoframes.
4) NEW BLOG :im totally getting bored of my blog. new layout soon, now that i have so much time up my hands, html html html. that's right. im a geekazoid like that. im itching to get a formspring, even though it gonna be embarrassing if no one asks me questions, which is highly likely. but its so funny to read. and perfect for me, the annoying queen of retarded useless answers to any question asked. haha, so yeah, might try to get one.
5) and the last and most boring of all :CATCH UP WITH SCHOOL SHIT. with bidding and tutorial ballots coming up and buying of textbks :'( *frantic beeping sound to indicate stress and tension* oh then *boom* au revoir

ahhhh updates ovar.
now for the bkk trip.
hahahah, firstly to start it off:
we missed our flight!
it wasnt really funny at first, but you can imagine my reaction.
honestly god, some originality please, you've used this on me too many times to even surprise me. tsk.
after that it was alright, we ended buying another pair of tics from budget. mega-zzzzz-sauraus.
trip was good, we are very productive shoppers. haha.
but poor dearie had to follow us around buying clothes and beauty products.
awwwww.
and then when we came back...
apparently thai airways had cancelled our flight since we missed the plane inbound for bkk.
spell: f-u-c-k-e-d u-p
so the officer at the changi airport dint think of helping us reconfirm our flight back after we told her we were taking another plane into bkk.
so much for best service.
anyways, thanks to the prompt service from the thai side we did get our seats in the end.
LOLS, all in all, drama ttm.
i've tried running to the plane but not missing the plane entirely. hahahahahaha.
im gonna think twice about morning flights now.
ah yeah, that was about it i guess, whatever happened in between starts with shop and ends with ping.
satisfied shopper :D :D :D
heehee.

kknights.

2010-07-17T02:45:00.002+08:00

CHALET CHALET CHALET :D
awesome awesome awesome.
as much as i love my arts camp peeps,
union og is still the bestie best.
its awesome to have a bunch of ppl who are so spontaneous and fun and stead on.
yayes, i love you gangsters.
shall upload some pics soon.
havnt been uploading pics in my entries for damn long.

and and and...
i dint have work all week!!!
damn awesome.
i am a (baby) sloth :D

i am a happy happy person.
tweets.

2010-07-05T00:33:00.002+08:00

ooooo i havnt blogged in so longggg!
hahaha nothing much to update anyone about
life's boring

work work work
i think after work i might not touch emails for about 17 years?
someone please check my nus email for me then

tuition work tuition work
sigh sometime i wished i had more tuition if not for the fact that its damn annoying esp when you have something on at night and tuitions just have to be in the evenings
oh well
what other job pays you 20 dollars an hour "helping" my tuition kid with her word search book while she does her assessments right
haha smart kids ftw

union camp coming up this week!
woohoo
3 days work week and 2+++++ whole days to spend with my now very free dearie :D
yayes

SIGH NEED TO DO MOD PREF SOON.
OMFG.
I HATE BIDDING.
FKING HATE MISSING MY MODS.
RAWR.

2010-06-23T16:20:00.002+08:00

shopping is essential.
so is money.
to make essential possible.
needa make money.

our little island has proven itself yet again to be too small a place to fuck up without dire conquences. like a place you cant clean up because someone keeps pouring crap over the same spot whenever they walk pass. and they tell others to dirty it too. BOOHOO. the solution? not mr muscle the weird detergent thingy, no. just dont fuck up seriously. keep yourself under some straps if neccessary. or simply admit yourself into a mental institution if you find that infinitely difficult.

and dont take this personally dearie. haha.

2010-06-13T21:04:00.003+08:00

phyllis is just rotting her days away.
phyllis hates her job.
its horrible.
please call her back jobbie.
she needs you jobbie.
now that greys left her :(
it did end well though.

phyllis thinks the beatles is the best.
give her whatever they're high on.
she's susceptible to drugs, she is.

When something begins, you generally have no idea how it's going to end. The house you're going to sell becomes your home, the roommates you were forced to take in become your family and the one night stand you were determined to forget becomes the love of your life.

Doctors spend a lot of time focused on the future, planning it, working toward it. But at some point you start to realize your life is happening now. Not after med school, not after residency, right now. This is it. It's here. Blink and you'll miss it.

Did you say it? 'I love you. I don't ever want to live without you. You changed my life.' Did you say it? Make a plan. Set a goal. Work toward it, but every now and then, look around; Drink it in 'cause this is it. It might all be gone tomorrow.

Sometimes the past is something you can’t let go of. And sometimes the past is something we’ll do anything to forget. And sometimes we learn something new about the past that changes everything we know about the present.

phyllis loves talking in 3rd person.
phyllis is weird, she is.

i hate my name.

2010-06-09T06:02:00.002+08:00

DEAD CAP.
CAP DEAD.

and did i mention, my mother stalks me on facebook.
and if that is not enough, she stalks jacob on facebook.
wow.
just wow.

goodbye to paris.
hello to sweden.

we all fuck up sometime or another.
some just more literal than others.

i dont know why i had to put that loving posed photo of tigerwoods.

2010-05-31T02:04:00.003+08:00

now all there's left to do is to convince myself that results are secondary.
ITS THE PROCESS THAT MATTERS.
WHAT PROCESS?!!!!!!!
ugh.
whyyyyyyy,
i dont want to get my results back :( :( :( :(
anytime soon.
anytime at all :(
upsetting this is upsetting.
i want my little bubble back.
give me back my little bubble.

results are secondary
results are secondary
results are secondary
results are secondary
results are secondary

fuck,
french again.
this time:
conquer the olevels :(
NOOOOO, my weekday nights.
my december holidays.
my sem 1.
:( :( :( :( :( :(

why does academics rule my life :(
runnnnnnn.

2010-05-22T15:36:00.001+08:00

Maintaining there is no point changing
Cause that's just what you are
That's just what you are
Now I could talk to you till I'm blue in the face
But we'd still would arrive the very same place
With you running around
And me out of the race

opposites attract but complements last

2010-05-22T13:50:00.003+08:00

so i finally synced my hotmail account to mail on lappy,
since HOTMAIL refuses to work.
read through all the mails to filter away whatever is useless but left there over the years.

i chanced upon our weird threads,
when i dint have unlimited sms,
and we resorted to emails.
and actually wished i could go back to something like that.
when i could tell him anything at all.
bitch about the common people we knew,
about our lives.
and he would remember exactly what we talked about,
who we talked about,
even after i forgot.

now read this people.
no matter how impossibly long it is.

Complements are often mistaken for opposites, perhaps a sign that we don’t have the proper phrasing to accurately distinguish the two. Opposites are black and white, completely opposing forces; complements are two sides to the same coin, two forces that flow together more harmoniously than each could were it separate. Many people mistakenly view the Taoist yin-yang symbol as a representation of opposites when, in fact, it is a representation of complements. Yin and yang circle around one another, each representing different parts of a greater whole, each completing the other to form a perfect whole.

Attraction is the recognition of complementary aspects in another person. We’ve all had the experience of being drawn to someone that, logically, we should not be attracted to. They’re too young or too cocky, they’re not pretty enough or in good enough shape…yet we find ourselves attracted to them. This type of attraction goes on at a deep, subconscious level that some would call the soul. Our soul, some believe, is always deficient in some way and always seeking to complete itself. It’s not an opposite that we yearn for, it’s our other half, the part that will make our soul complete.

Most of the people we’re attracted to are quite similar to us in some way. Most of the ways people meet seem to indicate this as a truth. A friend of mine who is a wedding photographer found some patterns: most of the couples met either at work, through a shared activity (class, sports, etc.), or through church. Each of these three indicate similarity between the two people in their chosen profession, in their hobbies, and in their spiritual beliefs, respectively. But if your partner were exactly the same as you, they would not be nearly as attractive. If you ever travel so far as to run into yourself, you will surely wish to take your exit as soon as possible. You don’t need another you because another you doesn’t bring anything new into your life. That’s why you’re attracted to someone who is similar, but not the same, someone who is a complement and not an opposite.

If attraction is the recognition of your complement, then love is the realization of that complement. Falling in love has been referred to throughout history as two people becoming one, and there’s nothing that could be more accurate. Being in love with someone means that some major parts of you have found their complement in the other person; you feel whole having this connection. There are numerous stories of people rising to greater challenges and achieving higher goals after being in love. This makes perfect sense, of course, as a complete person is incredibly powerful.

This also makes sense in the context of one of the most powerful experiences people can have: a break up. The only other life event that causes such a drastic and sudden emotional response is the death of a loved one. In a way, a break up is a sort of death. The complements that you had found in that other person are suddenly and ferociously ripped from your being. Even if the break up was logical, as in the case of abuse, the pain you feel goes far beyond emotion…it literally tears at your soul. You feel like nothing will ever be right again, your entire being shakes knowing that the other person is gone. Why the big deal? You had survived for numerous years in your life before meeting this person and did just fine, yet now, the thought of not having him or her there is unbearable. The pain you feel is the loss of your complement, the process of once again becoming incomplete after spending so much time as a whole person. It’s brutal and it can take some time to recover. But you do.

After recoving from the loss of your beloved, often times you’ll find that you are, in fact, more complete than before you met your ex. Even though that other person is gone, some of the complements you found in them actually became a part of you. You may find that you’re more confident or have a different view of life. In effect, you have absorbed the complements that were present in your ex, making yourself closer to being whole. The next attraction will continue the trend, identifying more complements that are necessary for your own growth.

So try looking back at your past relationships with gratitude. At some level, they all helped you grow and become a more complete person. And remember, it’s not because they were your opposite, it’s because they were your complement.

and you couldnt even read pass this. haha.
it just means that if you have been through enough breakups,
absorbed enough complements,
soon.
you can be yourself, a whole self,
all alone.

now that makes SO MUCH SENSE.
doesnt it?
that's exactly what we're doing now.
i may not be a better person,
but im definitely a more complete one.

2010-05-19T05:41:00.003+08:00

from bin-theultimatelyawesomequotefinder-bin again :D

as much as i hate to admit it,
so true.

2010-05-14T14:49:00.001+08:00

The big ship sails,
On the alley, alley oh.
The alley, alley oh.
The big ship sails,
On the alley, alley oh.
On the last day of September.

The captain says,
"It will never never do,
Never never do,
Never never do."
The captain says,
"It will never never do",
On the last day of September.

The big ship sank,
To the bottom of the sea,
The bottom of the sea,
The bottom of the sea.
The big ship sank,
To the bottom of the sea,
On the last day of September.

We all dip our hands,
In the deep blue sea,
The deep blue sea,
The deep blue sea.
We all dip our hands,
In the deep blue sea,
On the last day of September.

im on the big ship~

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

THINK TIME

2010-05-12T00:44:00.002+08:00

yeah, so i was reading your post weitingting,
if you ever see this.
but yups, it really means so much.

about facebook and all.
its just an example,
but so true in everyway.
you try to know a person through facebook,
learn about their past and their lives now,
you just want to know the person better.
and im saying this because
this applies to so many (friends or stalked preys)
(and yes lying fuckers, we ALL stalk people,
its up to you to admit you're like everyone else)
things that you were just not there to experience or feel.
but how much can you really know.
the feelings, the thoughts.
its just not the same person.
and sometimes, its just not what you want to know.
feels like you missed out on so much.
feels like you can do so much more.
i could,
maybe be there for a change.
maybe bump into them earlier.
but afterall, its just,
what's the point.
i was NOT there.
(or in the case of stalked preys,
we never knew the person in the first place)

its true what you said, that,
its what makes us human.
we remember and we forget.
but think about it,
how often do we remember the happy things.
its the pain and the heartbreaks that linger on.
and the happy things,
those are just exceptions.
so that you can fall harder when the pain comes.
that's the irony of it all.

so then what's the point of remembering,
when it hurts so much.
id really rather just forget.
even the happiness.
just so i dont have to live through the pain.
that's probably selfish.
but the joy just makes the pain hurt more,
so yes, i rather forget.
everything.

but on a lighter note:
omfg, going back to how i met your mother is like the best thing that happened since the exams ended. i love you barney. you are the funniest guy ive ever met. hahahahahahahaha. and oh yes, ive met you in my dreams.
"a lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth"
so fucking true.
the truth ruins everything.
its just better living a lie,
as long as you dont know the truth.

oh and people.
shutter island is the best god damn show ive watched in a long time.

aimee mann- that's just what you are

2010-05-10T01:25:00.001+08:00

heres the vid for previously posted lyrics :D (in case you were wondering)

Two Door Cinema Club -- Undercover Martyn

2010-05-10T01:20:00.001+08:00

And she spoke words that would melt in your hands
And she spoke words of wisdom
To the basement people, to the basement
Many surprises await you
In the basement people, in the basement

You hid there last time, you know we're gonna find you
Sick in the carseat, cause you're not up to going
Out on the main streets, completing your mission
You hid there last time, you know we're gonna find you
Sick in the carseat, cause you're not up to going
Out on the main streets, completing your mission

2010-05-09T01:49:00.001+08:00

In our endeavor
We are never seeing eye to eye
No guts to surface
So forever may we wave goodbye
And you're always telling me
That it's my turn to move
When I wonder what could make the needle jump the groove
I won't fall for the oldest trick in the book
So don't sit there and think
You're off of the hook
By saying there is no use changing
Cause that's just what you are
That's just what you are
Acting steady
Always ready to defend your fears
What's the matter with the truth
Did I offend your ears
By suggesting that a change might be a thing to try
It would kill you just to try and be a nicer guy
Its not like you would lose
Some critical piece
If somehow you moved point A to point B
Maintaining there is no point changing
Cause that's just what you are
That's just what you are
Now I could talk to you till I'm blue in the face
But we'd still would arrive the very same place
With you running around
And me out of the race
So maybe you're right
Nobody can take
Something older then time
And hope you could make it better
That would be a mistake
So take it just so far
Cause that's just what you are
That's just what you are
That's just what you are
Acting steady
Always ready to defend your fears
(That's just what you are)
What's the matter with the truth
Did I offend your ears
(That's just what you are)
Sleepwalking man, it's a danger to wake you
(That's just what you are)
Even when it is apparent where your actions will take you
(That's just what you are)
And that's just what you are
And that's just what you are
That's just what you are

2010-05-07T17:35:00.002+08:00

telephone is like the weirdest music video i have ever watched. LOL.
gaga is making beyonce weird too.
hahahahaha.
trust is like a mirror.
you can fix it if its broken.
but you can still see the cracks in the motherfucking reflection.
LOLSSSSSSSSSS.
wtf kind of relevance does this have to do with the song at all?!
still,
true that.
HAHAHAHAHAHA.
honey bee, we're on a pussy wagon.
OH MAN, what is gaga teaching kids.
this is just weird.

animal -neon trees

2010-05-06T13:49:00.002+08:00

Here we go again
I kinda wanna be more than friends
So take it easy on me
I'm afraid you're never satisified.
Here we go again
We're sick like animals
We play pretend
You're just a canible
And I'm afraid I wont get out alive
No I won't sleep tonight.

Oh, oh
I want some more
Oh, oh
What are you waitin' for?
Say goodbye to my heart tonight.

Here we are again
I feel the chemicals kickin' in
It's gettin heavier
And I wanna run and hide
I wanna run and hide.
I do it every time
You're killin' me now
And I won't be denied by you
The animal inside of you.

Oh, oh
I want some more
Oh, oh
What are you waitin' for?
Say goodbye to my heart tonight.

It's just the world is quiet
So hush we both can't fight it
It's us that made this mess
Why can't you understand?
Woah I won't sleep tonight.
I wont sleep tonight.

Here we go again
Here we go agiain
Here we go again

somewhere somehow

2010-05-02T04:35:00.002+08:00

i was made to do this dearie :)
its my purpose,
well, other than finding somewhere somehow with you :)
0.01%happy today.
1 little happy at a time.
i hold all the faith in,
cause if there's someone who can find somewhere somehow,
im sure its you.
you were the one who left it there in the first place.
you're just a starfish who forgot where it is and
im just lost.

p.s. binnie, you are officially the best quote finder EVER. thankew :D
miss you all psfo. hugs hugs hugs.

2010-05-01T00:04:00.010+08:00

"January has issues with her mother, February is always talking about things he wants to do while March does them, April eats sweets and May pays for them, June is the oldest but not the wisest and July always has an opinion on everything. August never stops trying do the right thing, even if he doesn’t always know what that is. September once saw something so sad, she never stopped crying. October holds the lift for anyone, vice-presidents and street-sweepers alike (for his memory, not for theirs) and November makes fun of him for this. December is tired but always hopeful. He has never once stopped believing.

Monday’s obviously a bastard, quite literally as dad can’t remember what or who he was doing. Tuesday’s temperamental but ok as long as you stay on her good side. Wednesday doesn’t say much and Thursday sometimes hums just to break the silence. They’re in love. Friday’s always wasted and she and Saturday hold each other tightly until their delirium fades.

But Sunday, Sunday knows she’s the end. But she closes her eyes, and she pretends with all the strength in her tiny heart that really, she’s the dawn."

that's the one thing about september that she holds on to something and it haunts her forever

2010-04-28T08:10:00.006+08:00

for everyone's entertainment.
i have proven all of you right!
i am officially a retard.

for anyone who wants a better idea of my awesome adventure yesterday, here it is:

overslept, woke up at 4.30 when my exam is at 5.
rushed down to cab and reached school at 5:05.
oh well, 5 minutes doesnt sound bad at all, right?
wait for it.
so i looked at my paper with all my exam dates venue and seat no.
rushed up to hall2.
told the assistants that my seat number was 702 (when it was 405)
but that doesnt matter at all.
since the last student is NO. 66 in that hall.
FUCK.
but being as frantic as i was,
decided to just seat at any place available.
only to see the paper on the table.
CHEMICAL KINETICS.
FUCK.
so i went into an engineering hall,
sat down and was about to leave.
went back downstairs.
stared at the board and wow, hall1: MNO1001
dont i take that module?
looked for my name on the board and there it was.
WOW. MNO1001.
looks at the book i have prepared for my (i thought) open book exam: FINANCIAL ACCOUNTING.
FUCK.
MNO1001: open book, lectures notes and textbook allowed.
FUCK.
went into the hall more than 10minutes late.
FUCK.
sat down and saw a brand new subject in front of me.
FUCK.
8 essay questions open book.
FUCK.

but you know what's consoling about it?
life just cant get any worse.
i think god is trying to prove me wrong.
cause i said the same thing the day before,
when it all fell apart.
now, this you see here. this is a joke.
cause maybe god CAN prove me wrong,
simply by making today worse than the day before or yesterday.
now, that. would just not be funny anymore.
i hope you found it funny god,
i hope you had fun.

2010-04-26T03:36:00.000+08:00

when i grow up, i wanna be pretty :D

It Is What It Is By Lifehouse (W/ LYRICS)

2010-04-21T04:56:00.000+08:00

omg MEGA LOVES
its so stuck in my head :D

LOOKBOOK.nu: "turquoise" by Kayla Hadlington

2010-04-19T04:27:00.000+08:00

LOOKBOOK.nu: "turquoise" by Kayla Hadlington:
i want my cute awesome hearty heart shaped wallpaper
because im so in ❤ with it

2010-04-17T20:30:00.002+08:00

“I know I’m not a world-renowned surgeon and I know I’m not a lot of things you’ve gone for in the past. I know. But, I would never leave you. I would never hurt you. And I will never stop loving you.”
— George O’Malley

“I’ve heard that it’s possible to grow up. I’ve just never met anyone who’s actually done it. Without parents to defy, we break the rules we make for ourselves. We throw tantrums when things don’t go our way. We whisper secrets with our best friends in the dark. We look for comfort where we can find it. And we hope… against all logic, against all experience. Like children, we never give up hope.”

— Meredith Grey

“When something begins, you generally have no idea how it’s going to end. The house you’re going to sell becomes your home, the roommates you were forced to take in become your family and the one night stand you were determined to forget becomes the love of your life.”
— Meredith Grey

“Don’t wonder why people go crazy. Wonder why they don’t. In face of what we can lose in a day, in an instant, wonder what the hell it is that makes us hold it together.”
— Meredith Grey

“Everytime I look at you… I feel better. It shocks me. It knocks my wind out, but it’s true. I don’t have to have sex with you, I’d be happy just looking at you from across the room. And even that, anything, any piece of you. And, hopefully, all of you…that’d be the best thing. Because I love you .”
— George O’Malley

i vaguely remb why i loved watching greys because despite all the idealistic thoughts, there is some truth in the words they say. no matter how unrealistic it may seem. it just warms your heart to know that maybe, sometime, somewhere, somehow, there would be that someone. and most of the time, i wish dream and hope for this life somewhere else. where these things can actually happen, not remain some narration in an american drama.

2010-04-17T20:03:00.003+08:00

i know why marcus is fat
cause he's everyone's little cushion when they fall
and it hurts just a little too much than what they can take
and little did they know that
all they needed is just a critical prick
who will scold you out of your senses
and wake up your idea little bitch

i miss dinners when
im scolded for being retarded
and stupid
and fat
and silly

yet he never stopped me from doing anything i convinced myself to do

which is also why i always get scolded again
because "i fucking told you so!"
but its true,
that most of the time,
i really should have listened to you...

just felt like crediting you for being such an asshole marcus.
haha.

2010-04-17T19:49:00.003+08:00

why is it that you never get the difference?

2010-04-17T19:14:00.002+08:00

i regret not buying this shirt the other time
perfect shirt for a time like this
i WILL buy it the next time i see it

✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫✫

2010-04-12T00:54:00.008+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAT DEARRRR :D
im so happy that youre so happy
cant stop loving you enough too ❤

2010-04-11T05:09:00.003+08:00

2010-04-07T05:56:00.002+08:00

You're better then the best
I'm lucky just to linger in your light
Cooler then the flip side of my pillow, that's right
Completely unaware
Nothing can compare to where you send me,
Lets me know that it's ok, yeah it's ok
And the moments where my good times start to fade

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile

Even when you're gone
Somehow you come along
Just like a flower poking the sidewalk crack and just like that
You steal away the rain and just like that

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile

I < / 3 WEDNESDAYS

2010-04-07T05:47:00.001+08:00

im gonna make this wednesday different
HMPH.
never again will i attend any lessons before 10am
boo to microecons :(

AND IM SO FKING DEAD FOR EXAMS.
acc: i have no idea what's going on
micro: i have absolutely no idea what's going on
macro: its too hard to understand what's going on
changing: i dont know the point of what's going on
mno: i cant read pass 5 pages of readings

and i have minimal days left
so please,
try harder
stop procrastinating
stop wasting time on unneccessary things
stop shopping online
stop SLEEPING :(

why does it seem like its never coming
since when has 1 month became so long
holsssssssssssssss

tweets
tweet tweets
tweet tweet tweets
...

im bored

2010-04-03T05:44:00.002+08:00

when will i ever put enough thought into writing a diary?
never born with the brains to remind myself to write either.
oh well.

corn

2010-04-03T05:23:00.004+08:00

LIKE F-I-N-A-L-L-Y i can bloggggg.
ughh.
stupid blogger and their errors.

what day is it?
everyday's a stu-day.
HAHAHA.
corneyyy
corneaaaaaa-ier
ok, now i'm getting retarded.
study is not good for the brain,
not good at all.

i'm dying people.
let's go out soon.
outings, dinners, picnics, lunch, whatever.
just freaking get me out during the hols.
p.l.e.a.s.e.

and i have this unkerbable (not a word) urgh to shop,
after saving up all the money,
its time to shoppppp.
hmm, k,
maybe i wont have that much money left after next week.
but whateverrrrrr.
i need to shop NOW.
itch itch itch itch itch.
and i really really really want the bb.
if only you would stop acting up n97mini.
sometimes,
i really need to differentiate
what i want and what i need.
why was i not born with this discerning ability?

my tuition kid asked me why i keep putting full stops after all the sentences i write for her.
and she insists they are numerical statements hence there is no need for full stops.
sigh, why kids, why so insistent?
i love fullstops.
they complete my life.
without them, i'm be in a comma.
hahahahahahahahhaha.
ok, that's not funny.
but i'm dying.
so unfunny jokes are justifiable.
again: unfunny is not a word.
just in case little kids are reading this.

and nope, i'm gonna keep using my fullstops.

2010-03-27T03:27:00.003+08:00

hopefully at the end of the finals, i can say,
thank god i studied despite my horrible midterms,
thank god for the little bit of perserverence i have.

hide and seek

2010-03-22T01:16:00.002+08:00

find love in the largest fights and the smallest details ♥

friends, please come back to me.
i did not abandon you :(

07s78 ♥

2010-03-17T02:10:00.003+08:00

i miss formal jc
when sleeping in classes were a luxury
not a choice
and copying homework to hand in was a chore
not a commodity
i kind of love s78 :D
all the outcasting in class and kping weirdos
its the diversity that i love
awww
we really need to have an outing soon
i miss kaishan and his weird comments
standing up in class
yuguang and his "fuck you kaishan"
and how can i forget melissa
ok weird, but its the weird ppl in class that i miss
i think i really kp them quite a lot. HAHA.
BITCHHHHHHH.

but you know,
i'm still a nice person when you dont piss me off.
right?

weird post on barney

2010-03-09T03:31:00.004+08:00

HAHAHAHAHA.

barney is a dinosaur
who only has 2 fingers
he is purple and he is
very enormous

to you my very retarded dear,
this is the real version:
Barney is a dinosaur from our imagination
And when he's tall
He's what we call a dinosaur sensation
Barney's friends are big and small
They come from lots of places
After school they meet to play
And sing with happy faces
Barney shows us lots of things
Like how to play pretend
ABC's, and 123's
And how to be a friend
Barney comes to play with us
Whenever we may need him
Barney can be your friend too
If you just make-believe him!

p.s. i dont think you should be very proud of having a barney post dedicated to you.
HAHAHAHA.

edit: now he thinks his song has educational values cause it teaches kids to count and differentiate colours. LOLLLLLLL.

FAILED

2010-03-04T02:59:00.004+08:00

i'm starting to learn...
that macro is like a relationship
nothing will ever prepare you enough for it.
so the next time i have a macro exam...
i'll be rolling around in bed,
not mugging my ass off at 2am.
i'll be sleeping during my 3 hour break,
not continuing to mug my ass off.
difference much?
i dont think so.
either way. hello to the bell curve.
i live by you.
i'm terribly upset bitch.
you better run serene tan.
i wanna set you on fire.
ARGHHHHHHHHH!
>(

drafts

2010-02-28T14:34:00.004+08:00

the initial idea of drafts:
entries that you type while you are preparing your final post
that you feel is subpar and not ready

the secondary idea of drafts:
entries that you type but never have the courage to post
that you feel is stupid and afraid to show

the final idea of drafts:
entries that you type for yourself
that is not meant for anyone else
that you feel is pointless to even try to tell

2010-02-28T01:58:00.002+08:00

why is it that i always feel like i'm short-changing myself?

how is it possible,
being such a perfectionist.

i couldnt have been wrong.
shouldnt be.
must not be.

letter to self

2010-02-23T22:53:00.002+08:00

to phyllis.
congratulations.
you have successfully turned everyone against you.
that's right.
you are now of little significance.
that's right.
you're just trying too hard.
that's right.
please know your limits.
thanks.
from self.

voodoo girl

2010-02-17T13:34:00.001+08:00

Her skin is white cloth,
and she's all sewn apart
and she has many colored pins
sticking out of her heart.

She has many different zombies
who are deeply in her trance.
She even has a zombie
who was originally from France.

But she knows she has a curse on her,
a curse she cannot win.
For if someone gets
too close to her,

the pins stick farther in.

OMGGGGGGGG, i want
Tim Burton's The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy
its sooooooo... painfully sweet :D
but then again,
emo is no good
no good at all.

2010-02-15T02:17:00.002+08:00

I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles
In our eyes are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned
And I have to speculate that God himself
Did make us into corresponding shapes like
Puzzle pieces from the clay
True, it may seem like a stretch, but
Its thoughts like this that catch my troubled
Head when you're away when I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road for
Several weeks of shows and when you scan
The radio, I hope this song will guide you home

happy happy vday dear :D
thank you a million times for tolerating me in every little way.
and thank you again for the 1 000 001th time,
because you bothered to drive all the way to rot on the couch with me :D

spoils the post, but i still cannot believe i have to pay a $52.50 library fine.
FKKKKKKKKKKK :(
come on man, i'm sure there's a way around this. BAHHHH >(

bobmarley cover

2010-02-11T02:27:00.003+08:00

Old pirates, yes, they rob I
Sold I to the merchant ships
Minutes after they took I
From the bottomless pit
But my hand was made strong
By the hand of the Almighty
We forward in this generation triumphantly

Won't you help to sing these songs of freedom?
'Cause all I ever have
Redemption songs
Redemption songs

Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery
None but ourselves can free our minds
Have no fear for atomic energy
'Cause none of them can stop the time
How long shall they kill our prophets
While we stand aside and look? Ooh
Some say it's just a part of it
We've got to fulfill the book

Won't you help to sing these songs of freedom?
'Cause all I ever have
Redemption songs
Redemption songs
(These songs of freedom
Songs of freedom)

we should probably still have some faith in humanity.
what's the joy in living if we lose all belief.
if we were merely conceived to suffer this fate.

2010-02-11T02:11:00.002+08:00

i never quite loved econs so much :D
for once, solving the macro tut.
gives me so much satisfaction.
why cant micro just be like that.
why cant financial accting be like that.

maybe if you love it, it will love you back.
so from now on,
i love financial accting
i love microanalysis
i love mno (secretly the only truthful one)
i love changing landcape
i love macroanalysis

sometimes you just know that this time round you perhaps, maybe, could have, possibly, probably made the right choice for once.

OH GOD

2010-02-07T01:43:00.003+08:00

OMFG.
my body is going to disjoint at every single available soft bone that is slowly disintegrating.
my job requires me to stand for 12 hours.
but well, its not that bad.
you get to chat to interesting people. haha.
and i know one thing for sure now.
women are VULTURES.
FKING VULTURES when it comes to sales.
espppppp burberry.
i swear its literally like this

oh god.
they might as well just rob me or kill me to get the bags they want.
they are paranoid/violent/petty/greedy/insane people.
holy, i've genuinely never seen that many ppl so excited over something before.
and its not funny.
esp when you're the one holding that 1 bag 20 ppl are fighting for.
not cool man.
its practically raping. haha.
please let tmr be over.
i hope you evil women queue another 2 hours outside just to get in again.
wahahaha.
stop raping me bitches.

woohoo new job means meeting new nice people :D
and new evil ppl too. BAH.
you are a joke bitch. haha.
ok, maybe i'm just being critical again.
but really, just get out of my sight alr.

okok, TATAAAAAA.

BAHHHH :(

2010-02-03T13:12:00.002+08:00

you know you know you know
shuhui, i have a fml day today too

i spent 14.30 cabbing to school,
which would normally cost me 6.60.
took me an hour to reach school
was late for 20 mins for micro tut
dint get my attendence in the end.
FML

thennnn, rush off to accting tut
realised that i dint do my tut assignment
cause the schedule says tut for lecture week 4
WTF is tut for lecture week 4?!
week 4 or tut covering lecture week 4????
nvm, its still my fault cause i dint do the tut
after finally getting my textbook yesterday.
major fml too.

so i officially lost several percent of my cap this sem just today.
:( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(
pull up my socks NOW.

2010-01-31T20:44:00.000+08:00

somethings never change.
i'll just keep wondering if it was a mistake.
i was never a forgive and forget person.

"Most of us can forgive and forget; we just dont want the other person to forget that we forgave"
~ Ivern Ball

2010-01-29T21:53:00.004+08:00

From overheard@nus

At an Intercultural class:
"Where do you find Bangladeshis in Singapore?" Class:" Little India"
"How about Thais" Class: "Golden Mile"
"Filipinos?" Class: "Lucky Plaza"
"China Nationals?"..........Silence from the lecture group.

Then a lone voice:
"Everywhere"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
*nods my head vigorously in consent*

LIGHTS

2010-01-21T00:19:00.001+08:00

Don't think too hard, if you think it hurts that bad
Don't talk about it, don't let it get you down
It's only one part, of the story
Just let it go, don't let this get you down now.

Sing the last thing on your mind
The last word on your breath
I'll be the one to keep you, keep you at your best
The last thing on your mind
'Cause I don't need your mess
I'll be the one to keep you one disaster less

Straighten up your tie, take the microphone
Forget about it, don't let it get you down
Now is not the time, and you're not alone
Shut up about it, no one can bring you down now

I'll be okay, if you're okay

songs make me happy :D :D :D

why love is punishment

2010-01-16T23:03:00.006+08:00

According to greek mythology, humans were originally created with 4 arms, 4 legs and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, zeus split them
into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves.

Pluto's The Symposium

2010-01-16T22:38:00.001+08:00

Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The trouble-makers. The round heads in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules, and they have no respect for the status-quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify, or vilify them. But the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

2010-01-09T03:39:00.002+08:00

HELLO PEEPS,
backkkk from bkkkk.
shopping was a-w-e-s-o-m-e.
but walking was a bitch.
home sweet home :D :D
shall upload pics on fb soon.
not much pics,
but i think the pattaya pics were probably prettay :D
the cam seems to do MUCH better in the sun.
this 4 days feel like 4 weeks.
my eyes are burning and
my whole body is achinggggg like mad.
BOOO :(
time to take a rest now and pick up the loots from my bag in the mornnnn.
loving home <3

2010-01-05T00:59:00.002+08:00

WAHAHAHAH, bkk here i come :D :D
shopping ftw.
leaving ftl.

i'll be back soooooon enough yup.

and weeeeex,
my last dose of l4d2 before school starts again.
BAHHHHHHH.

2010-01-04T02:00:00.002+08:00

i might as well have dug my own grave.
haha. graveyard my assssssss.
no way i'm drinking that shit ever again.
at least i got to see you funny qiao!
wahahahahaha. awesome lah.

and my mom just got 9034728572 times more paranoid after last night.
tsk. she's totally weirdddddd.
bahh.

what kind of a random blog post is it?

i cant seem to find any substantial resolution this year.
HMMMMMM.

a new year's thoughts

2009-12-31T03:01:00.002+08:00

HAHAHAH, to welcome this new year of ours to come,
i decided to read some of my past blog entries.
WAHAHAHAHA.

and i realised:
that just last year, i was a really lame person.
like really really lame.
is it me or do i always seem to think i'm a lame person when i look back every year?
i remember being the sad and miserable phyllis after the a levels last year.
there was literally a blog entry cursing and swearing about how god forsaken my life was.

HAHAHAHAHA.
it just seems funny to look back now.
and realise that well,
things did work out in the end.
nus aint that bad.
i got my good friends with me :D
and yup, life's not that bad after all.
so here's to a great 2010 ahead!
(which somehow doesnt feel right actually)
but oh well, things will figure their way out.

is it me again, or did this year ended rather abruptly?
doesnt exactly feel nice and complete at all.
maybe the bkk trip is gonna wrap all of it up,
just like indonesia did.

2009-12-29T05:19:00.002+08:00

does anyone else get that same feeling when you look around you and see how fortunate you are but never fail to be dissatisfied with everything?

there is definitely some opportunity costs involved in being happy.

its never bright if there isnt dark.

sometimes it can hurt to be happy too.

BAHHHHH.
i can totally survive this.
a few more hours wouldnt kill.

hiking through

2009-12-23T02:18:00.004+08:00

sometimes, or rather, many times.
things just dont go according to plan.
its just a detour that would lead you on a different path.
no one knows if its a longer shorter smoother tougher path.
we just have to rough it out.
and we will be fine,
eventually.

that's what we'll tell ourselves.

but really, the truth is, who are we lying to,
its comfortable on the track.

and sometimes, really sometimes,
you just dont know if you should be happy or not.

my random job at raffles hotel is a painnnnnn,
completely dreaded, no, HATED.
fking boring.
i'd rather die than ever work there again.
ok, i shall say that after saturday :/
and i wanna get my pay HR dept!
haha. faster give me my payyyy.

open house comm can kill themselves for all i care.
zzz.
emailing and waiting is just no fun at all.
boooo.

christmas seems awfully boring this year :(
my fav fav fav season of all.

but at least we're still having our PSF PARTAY ppl!
lamb lamb lamb will be there :D
i think there'll be 3 per person.
sambuca will be there too obviously.
haha, its already settling itself comfortably at zesa's.

mewii party is on....28th i guess.
but i totally forgot who i'm supposed to buy it for.
wahahahaha. sorry peeps.

gift exchanges are going to kill my bank account :(
BAHHHHH.
brokeness for the lose.

i realised....
that i can no longer write or type in a coherent passage.

you know, everything is gonna end in about 5 sems.
that is 2.5 years.
several hundred weeks.
several thousand days.
sounds like a long time,
but we've come a long way,
wayyyyy longer than this.
so have some faith.

if someone asked me what uni life was like,
i'd tell them:
it is the time of your life, slackest days ever, can sleep all day, dont need to do your work, dont need to attend lectures, your lecturers/tutors dont give a fk about you.

you know why?
because those god damn bastards before me told me this big fat lie.
so i am going to do them the honor of passing it on.

2009-12-15T04:40:00.001+08:00

dont say i dint warn you.

2009-12-12T17:38:00.002+08:00

Cause you left me
Police scene, chalk line
Tequila shots
In the dark scene of the crime

when was the last time i posted lyricsssssss?

its cj's birthday today! :D :D
happy birthday cj, you'll be back in 5 days!
awesomeeeeeee.
bkk bkk, shopping ftw.

slap fighting was funnnnnnnnn. hahahaha.

omg, listverse is a winner web :D

2009-12-10T22:39:00.002+08:00

did you know?

In 1752, there were only 354 days in Great Britain and its colonies. This was because Britain adopted the Gregorian Calendar in place of the Julian calendar. The lost days were September 3 – September 13 inclusive.
(which is how sad, because they dint celebrate my birthday. hahahaha, then again, i wasnt even born :/)

that's what i call a fail:
The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin during World War II killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.

Josef Stalin once studied to be a priest.
(so much for mercy)

Albert Einstein was offered the role of Israel’s second President in 1952, but declined. HAHAHAHAHAHA. joke.

Hippopotamuses – incredibly dangerous creatures – have a very unique ability: instead of sweating, they exude a pink liquid which is a natural sun block. This, and their ability to spend an indefinite amount of time in the water helps to keep them safe from the blistering sun.
(so freaking cuteeee, haha)

Kangaroos can’t fart. They convert the small quantity of methane they produce into an energy source which their body reuses. Scientists hope that they will be able to transfer the bacteria that causes this in kangaroos to cows, to reduce methane emissions to save the world from the latest fashionable catastrophe: global warming.
(how awesome)

(ok, in case it is too long: you really want to read this)
In the original sleeping beauty, the lovely princess is put to sleep when she pricks her finger on a spindle. She sleeps for one hundred years when a prince finally arrives, kisses her, and awakens her. They fall in love, marry, and (surprise surprise) live happily ever after. But alas,the original tale is not so sweet (in fact, you have to read this to believe it.) In the original , the young woman is put to sleep because of a prophesy, rather than a curse. And it isn’t the kiss of a prince which wakes her up: the king seeing her asleep, and rather fancying having a bit, rapes her. After nine months she gives birth to two children (while she is still asleep). One ofthe children sucks her finger which removes the piece of flax which was keeping her asleep. She wakes up to find herself raped and the mother of two kids.

BLOODY RETARDED:
that's to prove you're retarded jacob. hahahaha.
And the most bizarre tale in the Bible goes too…this head-scratcher from Genesis, with its utterly bemusing explanation of the genetic code. Basically, Laban is taking all of Jacob’s beloved striped and spotted cattle. Jacob is left with boring old, plain-coloured cattle, which he doesn’t seem to like at all.
So Jacob concocts a cunning plan: he gets some sticks and begins painting stripes on them. He then plants them next to his cattle. What Jacob thinks is that if he gets his cattle to look at the striped sticks while copulating, then they will give birth to striped young. Now, we’d all expect this idiotic plan to fail and Jacob to learn a lesson about something or other, but no it actually works. The cattle give birth to striped young, and Jacob is happy.
What on earth is going on here? Anyone with the most basic understanding of genetics knows that this is bunk. The odd thing is that this story seems to have no purpose and moral – it’s just there. And I can’t help wondering how many scientists with painted sticks had attempted to repeat this process before Mendel came along and said, “I’m pretty sure that’s not how it’s supposed to happen fellas, why don’t we try this instead?”

2009-12-10T00:24:00.002+08:00

apparently, there are such things as free lunches in the world.

you just exchange for it with a whole lot of memory loss and guilt.

2009-11-29T15:33:00.002+08:00

hell yeah!
its gonna be december :D :D :D
fav fav fav fav fav month of the year.

2009-11-26T17:35:00.002+08:00

your friends give suggestions to how you should copyright your software, which one is correct?
a) friend 1 says: download the form and register your software now!!!!!! think abt how you can retire before 30 and earn hell lot of money.
b) friend 2 says: just write your name, year of programming and add a copyright sign! then think abt which high performance car you wanna get.
c) friend 3 says: we all witnessed it, its already copyrighted! he thinks you should pay for all their drinks.
d) friend 4 says : it is already copyrighted since its saved in your hard disk of the laptop! he thinks he deserves 2 drinks!
e) friend 5 is too drunk, he says all of the above are right! :D
mcq worth: 4 marks.
dont we all just love uni.

dont believe me?
qns option e) opps, i was reading my friend's sms in lecture.
next qns option e) opps, i was replying my friend's sms in lecture. ask me another qns.

love it.

2009-11-26T01:30:00.002+08:00

2 down, 2 to go.
PLEASE, be over soon.
or i wont survive till next sem.
sniff sniff.

2009-11-23T04:59:00.002+08:00

watch your back genes and soc, phyllis is here to kill you.
hmph, for causing me pain and misery all semester long.

and guest, seriously, i'm not meaning to be rude.
but really, WhoTF are you?!

2009-11-20T21:32:00.003+08:00

FKKKKK, exams are a bitch.
i keep feeling major insecurities, stupid MCQs, how to studyyyyyyy.
damn it.
there is a need for alcohol. right. now.
hahaha.
liver fail.

like my brain is not fried and burnt enough alr.

>:(

rawr.

9 days of misery and pain will be over soon.

2009-11-08T01:29:00.002+08:00

tsk, its so easy to tell when something's bugging me.
hahaha.
i am too obvious a person.
its easy to tell when i'm angry or i'm emo.
fail. blogging is not good at all.
it just causes ppl to bug me when they see i have an angry or emo post.

sometimes, its good to hide some stuff.
somethings are better left unsaid.
this is better left unsaid.
its a REAL secret.
cause only i know that i know what nobody knows that i know :D
its the convince-yourself-that-everything-is-going-to-be-alright time again!
love it.

2009-11-07T15:42:00.002+08:00

HMMM, i'm starting to believe that the truth always finds its way around.
and more often than not, its not a pretty sight.
giant sigh.

2009-11-03T03:23:00.002+08:00

some people were, are and will remain strangers from the start to the end.
end of what you ask?

2009-10-31T23:09:00.001+08:00

she kept her nose in a book and her head in the clouds

big trouble in little china

2009-10-26T04:25:00.003+08:00

omg omg omg, 3 down, 1 more to go :D :D
sometimes time flies flies flies pass when you're suffering.
its not as bad as i expected, the bitch can still be kind.

why man utd, what happened to all the faith.

Taking everything for granted but we still respect the time
We move along with some new passion knowing everything is fine
And I would wait and watch the hours fall in a hundred separate lines
But I regain repose and wonder how I ended up inside

More to the point, I need to show
How much I can come and go
Other plans fell through
And put a heavy load on you
I know there's no more that need be said
When I'm inching through your bed
Take a look around instead and watch me go

its amazing how lyrics can tell you so much more than you already know about your life.
awesome.

2009-10-25T21:14:00.000+08:00

I got some troubles but they won't last
I'm gonna lay right down here in the grass
And pretty soon all my troubles will pass
'cause I'm in shoo-shoo-shoo, shoo-shoo-shoo
Shoo-shoo, shoo-shoo, shoo-shoo Sugar Town

if only my essays would pass me right by.
be done, pieces of crap.

let's turn it up to 11!

2009-10-22T16:51:00.003+08:00

i need to watch Anvil again.
its an awfully inspiring show.

please. wednesday. come. faster.
need. to. finish. my. essays. before. i. grow. old.

shingz assimilation :D hahahah.

2009-10-22T05:53:00.002+08:00

ugly word of the term: ASSIMILATION!

reason: cause i dont give no crap about nasal/velar/palatal assimilation nor chinese stereotypes in the 1980s and assimilation of asians half way across the globe.

spare me the details.

that's bad.

2009-10-18T04:16:00.002+08:00

i have like work piling up but i cant decide on which one to start on first.... hahaha.
crap, this is pretty bad man.
HMMM.
genes essay? film and hist essay? film and hist report? el proj?
which which which :/
i'm so dead next week. no sleep forever.
ohhhh emmmm geeeeee.

please tell me we're going to bkk tania.
i will die if i stay in this shitty place anymore.

need some more time.
more than 24hrs, more than 7days, more than 30days.

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH(takes over profanities)

2009-10-16T03:58:00.004+08:00

whyyyy cant mon tues wed thurs fri sat and sun be nicer to me :(
i'm really sorry :/
somethings are just about trust.
actually most things are about trust.
and its hard to earn it back when you've lost it.
still, i shall be honest.
i'm damn screwed up i swearrrrrr :(

please disappear evil scratches :( :(
WHYYYYY. why you appear....
there are like 4985738945734 million vulgarities in my mind right now.
sweep sweep sweep. get out, inappropriate language.
omfg, i will die from guilt. slowly. shrivel. up. and. die.

i will be a super safe driver from now on :( :( :(
life should be nicer to me, really, i've paid my dues man.

2009-10-14T00:59:00.002+08:00

omg, emo emo.
why cant life start all over again....
i'll do everything so differently.

why cant i be a normal kid, do my exams and wait for the holidays?

2009-10-08T03:23:00.006+08:00

the yeah yeah yeahs are actually a pretty awesome band.
zero's good.

You're a zero
What's your name?
No one's going to ask you
Better find out where they want you to go

Try and hit the spot
Get to know it in the dark
Get to know it whether you're
Crying, crying, crying out loud
Can you climb, climb, climb higher?

i tell myself too many things,
i dont believe you anymore.
(sings to broken strings)
i cant even convince myself.
sometimes you just try too hard,
you're not yourself anymore.
i wonder how i got to 2nd person again.

and i am not morbid nor emo nor have issues.

maybe its because i'm not a kid anymore.
and now, holidays come before exams.

2009-10-07T23:57:00.001+08:00

omfg! YAY :D
mids are overrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!

2009-10-07T00:40:00.001+08:00

its time for colonization of the microecons kingdom!

2009-10-04T18:32:00.001+08:00

el el el el el
ec ec ec ec ec
el el el el el
ec ec ec ec ec
i'll drown in el and ec.
el el el el el
ec ec ec ec ec
el el el el el
ec ec ec ec ec
thurs, please come fasterr
el el el el el
ec ec ec ec ec
el el el el el
ec ec ec ec ec

2009-10-01T22:11:00.004+08:00

there's so much you can choose to do with your life, so many choices to make that you cringe at the thought of the future. i never chose how i wanted it to be, i just followed. what my parents told me, what my friends told me, what i saw. so why do i have this feeling that its not leading me anywhere. i'm lost in this maze of a life.

why did yall leave me here to suffer alone evils.......
there's no one to guide me anymore.

i cant put it into words, but the winds are changing,
and its already different now.

my mom refuses to stop staring at my comp.
she's got her eyes glued on me,
for 1 reason or another.

2009-09-28T04:12:00.002+08:00

so many (more) things could have gone wrong, we should all be contented.

i'll be contented when the mid terms are over.
once again: thenmreadingsarefkingkillingme.
new media is *^?":{&^%
die nm die.
i will conquer you.

i just needed a media platform to rant all my discontent with 'new media'

2009-09-28T01:04:00.003+08:00

i want a new blog. this blog sucks :(
another 8 hours of html will kill me, this time round, i'm gonna steal.
before that, let's experiment with tumblr.
right here

let's watch the flowers grow

2009-09-27T05:46:00.002+08:00

There is no reason to feel bad
But there are many seasons to feel glad, sad, mad
Its just a bunch of feelings that we have to hold
But I am here to help you with the load
Wow, look at you now
Flowers in the window

it hurts i know, but we'll grow out of it as better people.

why is it that i dont have tics for travis on saturday f1,

and katy perry pangsehed us?

i insist that its all katy perry's fault that this had to happen :/

bitch.

we all have to find someone to blame.

mine's katy perry.

omg omg omg

2009-09-27T05:17:00.001+08:00

i can blog on the go now!!!
awesome :D
we all need something to take over the sadness
don't we.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

jabs are cool.

2009-09-25T11:58:00.003+08:00

thanks to the mega painful jab, i'm now slowly recovering from the mega itchy rash.
at the expense of my now rotting arm. i swear, its crippled.

convo between dad and me.
1) *wakes up in horror to find myself covered in rash - calls my dad*
me: omg, i got rash all over my body...... i need to go to the clinic NOW!
dad: see lah, drink somemore.
me: what drink?! i dint drink......
dad: ok.
2) *comes home to drive me to the clinic - the whole freaking journey*
dad: see..... why you drink until like that.
me: i did not drink...
dad: see lah, drink somemore alcohol.
me: i did not drink alcohol...
dad: then why like that huh. why got rashes?
me: there was no alcohol!
dad: i dont believe, you wont have a rash if you dont drink.
me: -.- (script: i give up.)
seriously, what happened to food allergies.

2009-09-25T02:59:00.003+08:00

fk you, evil rash.
you're killing me.
the thought of you disturbs me :(
oh man, i'm using inappropriate language.
you're diseased phyllis.
rawrrrrrrrr!

why cant parties be fun without alcohol anymore :(

what i've been doing with my study break

2009-09-23T10:36:00.002+08:00

sat: weehours @the airport and supper.
afternoon sleeping
maf @hc :D
sun: weehours deciding if i should go to hv. haha.
afternoon sleeping
timbre with 4a
mon: weehours recovering from the 2 jagerbombs
watching ps i love you again
afternoon sleeping
tues: waking up hell early to school
studied a wee bit
time traveller's wife
french
died from accumulative exhaustion
wed: waking up hell early again for el proj
mug mug mug
cutting my hair
accompanying toh to ion
(pangsehing my og at butter)
thur: waking up hell early AGAIN for tennis
mug mug mug
french
aneesa's party
fri: prob still at aneesa's chalet
afternoon recovering from exhaustion
i'm gonna be watching the f1!

please, let me have a free sat and sunday.
then again, its all by choice.
i never believe in peer pressure.

2009-09-21T03:03:00.001+08:00

my eyes are burning out of my skull,
but i cant sleep.

its all for the best.

2009-09-20T02:19:00.003+08:00

there are a hell lot of movies i wanna watch!
omg, there is no time and no one to watch with me.
and i wouldnt waste all my money on the movies anyways.
are they gonna show new york i love you in singapore?
i wanna watchhhh... :(
please show....

mummy says: soccer is for guys, now go and sleep.

maf brings back good memories!
i hate hc, but i'm missing school :(
i wanna have our own class bench, eat lunch together go to class together and go home together.
nus peeps! we need to lunch someday!

goodbyes and choices are always difficult,
how can anything return to what they were before.
we can only look forward and pray.

2009-09-19T02:40:00.003+08:00

OMFG.

ITS RECESS WEEK! :D

i resolve to spend it wisely on:

SLEEP

hanging out

and lastly, mugging.

NO.

MUGGING

sleep

hanging out.

setting my priorities right, i shall.

i promise to upload pics on blog soon.

to 10million flies, i'm weird cause i hate goodbyes.

people leave me emptier :/

i got misty eyes as they said farewell.

cause everything is never as it seems.

cj left and it will never feel real.

call her phone, i'm sure she'll pick up.

chenggggggggggg.

friendly fires are like interesting readings

2009-09-14T01:00:00.003+08:00

back to the 90s,
when the markets are full of people performing miraculous medical acts with their oilments.
its so awesome to relive chinatown. haha.
saw so much today, and brought me back to reality.
sometimes you just need to go back to the basics.

saw an old women slap a man even though she cut his queue. haha. and almost got into a fight, something you'll never see in town. not even anywhere in a neighbourhood i guess, unless you meet intoxicated people. saw a hawker and a cleaner quarrel the hell of themselves like 20 mins aft the police came and took the old women and man away. haha. i mean of course its not a good thing, but seriously, when was the last time you saw something like that, its terribly interesting. i went out to buy drinks only to realise that the whole mkt was taking about what happened, this is what a community is :D pretty cool pretty cool. not that i would want it to happen again though :/

One day we're gonna live in Paris
I promise
I'm on it
I'll find you that french boy,
You'll find me that french girl
I promise
I'm on it
- Paris: Friendly Fires

its all back to black and white before i finish my
assignment 2 for genes
project 3 for film and hist
nmedia grp report
60page nmedia readings
english tut
econ tut

Your love is old
But even despite it all
Give me your hand
Let's face this night and see it through
- Skeleton Boy: Friendly Fires

omg, i'm turning alternative.
no good at all.
its the whole fass thing.

from speech, to writings, to printing, to photography, to tv and radio, to the internet.
mapping the theological accounts of new media.
or simply: how i got to blogging now.
fkingnewmediareadingsarekillingme.
die.

ingrid <3

2009-09-11T04:01:00.000+08:00

Happy is the heart that still feels pain
Darkness drains and light will come again
Swing open your chest and let it in
Just let the love, love, love begin

comfort and peace comes in knowing.

more more more faith.

el1101 i will conquer!

driving down the pie.. all the way to changi :D

that's one reason i should be happy.

Once i made a man all out of snow
He had the darkest eyes and a button nose
I told him all my sadness and my fear
And he just listened with a snowy ear

But when i came around the next day
My friend had gone and melted all away
I saw his eyes lying on the ground
I made a sound that was something like crying

Oh, one day you will go away from this
Oh, one day you will know we're men of snow
We melt one day

And winters come and my love, the winters go
And time stacks up in piles like winter snow
And everything you love and hold so dear
Won't really matter when we disappear

2009-09-09T01:19:00.004+08:00

I've been roaming around, I was looking down at all I see
Painted faces fill the places I can't reach.

and its as if i never will.

Off in the night while you live it up I'm off to sleep
Waging wars to shake the poet and the beat.

i could use something more than somebody.

dead blog alert!

2009-09-08T18:19:00.003+08:00

i just have nothing to blog about :/

so... its been my birthday weekend.

fri: dinner and drinks with uc og

sat: malaysia with my parents and "road trip" ard cbd

sun: dinner with mewii

mon: dinner with psf

that has been what's up lately. haha. i know, sounds happening, but really, nope. its nothing like that.

back to "free" weds and thurs which are dedicated to purely mugging and no lessons.

how awesome.

i genuinely hate tuesdays, all the travelling for a useless module and EL makes me sick. bleh.

it just takes some time

2009-09-03T01:02:00.002+08:00

digging 'the middle' now :D

everything will be alright! alright!